Ask the most important question first. The visit can end before the list does.
On film, from the National Cancer Institute. Improving Cancer Care for Older Adults (NCI). A talk for clinicians about looking at the whole older person, not only the tumor. Watch enough to learn the phrase geriatric assessment, then ask whether anyone has done that look for you.
The National Cancer Institute and the American Cancer Society both tell you the same plain thing: write the questions down and take them in. A cancer visit is a lot of words in a short chair. Fear makes the words harder to keep. A card does not make you a difficult patient. It makes the visit about the cancer you have, not about the question you remember in the parking lot.
Bring a second person if you can. The American Cancer Society says that person can remind you of a question and write what was said. Ask whether you may record the visit on your phone. Some clinics allow it. Some want you to ask first. Either way, two sets of ears beat one.
The questions worth the top of the card
- What is the name of this cancer, and what stage do you believe it is? Please write both down.
- What treatments are actually options for this cancer, not for cancer in general?
- Which one do you recommend, and why that one for me?
- What is the goal: cure, control, or comfort?
- What are the benefits, and what are the risks, including the ones that put me in the hospital?
- When would treatment start, and will I stay overnight?
- How will we know if it is working?
- Would a clinical trial be something to ask about, or not for this cancer?
- Who do I call when the office is closed, and how fast should I expect a person?
- Which symptoms mean I go to the emergency room and say the word chemotherapy or radiation at the door?
Those lines are gathered from the National Cancer Institute’s question list and the American Cancer Society’s list for the day you are told. You do not have to ask all of them. Ask the ones that keep you up. If the doctor uses a word you do not know, say so. It is allowed to ask for a simpler word. It is allowed to repeat the plan back in your own sentences and ask whether you heard it right.
Age belongs in the room
The film on this page is the National Cancer Institute on cancer care for older adults, and on a geriatric assessment: a look at more than the tumor. Walking, memory, other illnesses, the medicines already in the house, who cooks, who drives. Treatment that is reasonable at fifty can be the wrong weight at eighty, and treatment that is dismissed as “too much for your age” can also be a guess. Ask whether anyone has looked at you, not only at the scan. The film is a lecture for clinicians. Watch the first minutes so you know the phrase, then ask your own team whether that kind of look is part of your plan.
After you stand up
Before you leave, ask for the name of the nurse or the navigator who answers the phone. Write the number on the same card. Ask for the names of the drugs on a printed sheet, not only spoken once. If you take a blood thinner, a diabetes medicine, or anything from the health-food aisle, say so at this visit. Some of those change how cancer drugs behave. Do not stop them on the way home because a pamphlet made you nervous. Stopping is its own decision, and it belongs to the person who prescribed them.
The card is yours
This page is a list of questions, not the answers. The answers have to come from the people who have seen your scans. If a website offers to choose the treatment for you after you type in your age, close it.
Sources to read yourself
- National Cancer Institute, Questions to ask your doctor about treatment
- American Cancer Society, Questions to ask when you have been diagnosed
- National Cancer Institute, Improving cancer care for older adults
A note from the desk
This is general reading, not a diagnosis and not a plan written for you. Before you change how you move, eat, or what you keep in the cabinet, ask your own clinician. Do not stop a prescribed medicine because of something you read.